2006-12-08

Holiday wishes for democrats and republicans

For My Democrat Friends:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for thereligious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply of course that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere . Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting these greetings, you are accepting the aforementioned terms as stated. This greeting is not subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself/himself/others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wish

For My Republican Friends:

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

7 comments:

Nadir said...

Happy Kwanzaa to you too, Six!

Paul Hue said...

It's wonder that lefties ever have any fun... accept that most of their beliefs reside in their heads and mouths, but not in their actions. Do you think that Nadir would hire a black drummer with fewer skills than a honkey drummer, or pay any of his bandmates minimum wages or healthcare, or refuse to raise his performance fees if suddenly he became famous (hey, he's price gouging!).

And Tom of course sells his produce on the open market, and would not take kindly to a government agent dictating a lower, "fairer" price. Nor would he cotton to such an agent informing him of a plan to "redistribute" his land parcel!

Paul Hue said...

I hope that Nadir is joking about Kwanzaa, which I consider to be a joke in itself.

Nadir said...

Paul is an asshole. I generally have fun if I don't have to deal with ignant muhfukas like him.

For the record my drummer is Jewish, I pay minimum wages and Kwanzaa is not a joke.

I am raising my fee for performance only at Paul's parties. I refuse to work with assholes.

Nadir said...

None of this has anything to do with Six's sarcastic, but humorous holiday wishes and in the spirit of the season, I bid you all a Happy Kwanzaa.

Paul Hue said...

Nadir: I didn't say you don't have fun. I said it's a wonder that lefties ever do, except when you realize that lefties never let their righteous convictions figure substantially into their personal actions. And if you raise your fee, you'd be charging yourself, as the party is thrown 2/3s by you you and your wife.

Paul Hue said...

Nadir has always had honkey musicians, but not due to govt-imposed diversity efforts that favored honkies with demonstrably lower musical accomplishments.